2010 July | The Bitch Blog

Dear Ms Bitch: My MIL Thinks I’m a Sex Fiend

Posted on Jul 30, 2010 in Dear Ms. Bitch |

I’ve been married five years to my husband. My in-laws never really liked me but tensions have been extra strained the last few years for various petty reasons. Last month, my mother in law was visiting relatives in town and stayed with us for a week. On the last day of her visit, she walked in on my husband and I having sex. That was bad enough but we weren’t just having regular sex. Without going into too many details, let’s just say if straight missionary is vanilla ice cream, we knee deep in rocky road. His mother freaked out and has been even more difficult since then. She makes little remarks about me being sex crazy and how I must have snagged her “perfect” son by being “loose.” I even think that she’s been telling other family members about what happened and implying that I’m some kind of sex fiend because of what she saw. How do I not only face down a woman who hates me but has also seen me in one of the most intimate moments possible? And how do I get her to shut up about it already?

And the Winner is. . . .

Posted on Jul 28, 2010 in The Bitch's Guide to Love | 4 comments

This year’s Bitch of the Year is:

Tracii Hooper Clark

Congrats girl! You’ll receive an email from us in a bit asking for your details so we can send you your prizes. But you can start bragging about your title now. :-)

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Because Jon Eventually Left That Bitch

Posted on Jul 26, 2010 in Bitchitude, Love | 2 comments

[Editors Note: Someone who runs a Gosselin fan site asked if they could use this blog post as a discussion point. I said sure because I love sharing, even though I'm pretty sure that no one would agree with my point of view here. It looks like his/her readers don't like the word Bitch to describe Kate (Not sure why. She fits my definition perfectly. I mean, aren't all the best mothers bitches anyway?). They also think that Jon either had his own equal verbal beat down deliveries left of the cutting room floor or deserved it because he was still douchebag then, just wasn't showing it yet. Still not convinced, but you guys should check it out here to see another point of view on this topic.]

I used to be a big fan of Jon and Kate plus Eight. I just loved to watch the chaos of their home (from afar) and the kids were super cute. If you were a fan of the show, you have to remember the way Kate talked to Jon. There were times that she literally ripped this man to shreds on camera. She was always going at him about his stupidity, laziness and fatness. I’m not saying that the man wasn’t stupid, lazy or fat. I’m just saying that it must have hurt to have your wife say these things while she rolled her eyes at you every five seconds and constantly interrupted you on national television.

jon gosselin changed yell Because Jon Eventually Left That Bitch

The truth is that my own marriage owes a lot to Kate and her bitching.

None of us who watched the show were that surprised when their marriage imploded and Jon became a nanny banging, Ed Hardy wearing, media whore douchebag. If you were like me, you almost forgave him for it because he had just spent almost ten years taking daily beat downs from Kate. Almost.

I’m a lot like the Kate Gosselin I’ve seen on all those episodes. I have a sharp tongue that I don’t always have full control over. I am also a recovering control freak that likes her life and home “just so.” But because I cringed as Kate would berate Jon in front of his face and behind his back, I’m much more aware of it. In fact, I often ask myself am I “kate-ing” the Hubs. Then I instantly become at least fifteen percent nicer. Because no matter how long he let her talk to him like that, Jon eventually left that bitch.

I love strong women, but. . .

When I talk about The Bitch’s Guide to Love, I almost always have to explain that it’s not a man-bashing book. Standing up for yourself doesn’t mean standing on top of other people. I’ve noticed that the strong women stereotype sometimes get out of control. Although I believe that a Bitch says what needs to be said even when it’s not easy, I don’t believe that constantly putting someone down is a sign of a good Bitch. You don’t have to beat another person down to elevate yourself. You don’t have to point out another person’s faults and weaknesses to show how strong you are.

Remember the look on Jon Gosselin’s face when Kate went off on him about some showerheads he bought without a coupon? Or that time he was over in one part of the store, and she screamed for him to come to where she was like he was some animal? Well picture that the next time you’re about to give your man a verbal beat down because he forgot to take out the trash again. Or spent more at the store than he should have. Or isn’t doing to the dishes the way you like them to be done.

Because we all make mistakes some times. The last thing anyone needs is the person who’s supposed to love us the most beating us up about it for the rest of my life.

As for me, I’m still a work in progress. But I do know that I love my own husband very much. So I’m going to do what I have to do to keep him from losing his mind, running away to the Playboy mansion and spending all his money on Ed Hardy t-shirts. Especially the Ed Hardy t-shirts. Over my dead body.

Do you have a problem sometimes giving out verbal beat downs without realizing how the other person may feel? Are you a Kate Gosselin fan? Did you think she went too hard on Jon or that he deserved tongue lashings? And if you’re a Jon fan (are there really any of you out there?), do you think that his douchebaggery is a direct result of Kate’s sharp tongue? Let me know in the comments below.

And the Bitch of the Year Nominees Are . . .

Posted on Jul 18, 2010 in The Bitch's Guide to Love |

The entries for the Bitch Blog’s first annual Bitch of the Year Contest are all in. There were some really good entries and I had a hard time picking the best one, but I finally got it done. So these are the nominees for Bitch of the Year 2010 in no particular order:

What My Dog Taught Me about Relationships

Posted on Jul 16, 2010 in Bitchitude, Love, Real Talk |

About two years ago, I was driving down the street when I suddenly saw a little scruffy black and white dog run into the street. I hit the brakes hard, got out and tried to see if I hit the dog. She seemed ok so I shooed her out of the street and told her to get herself home. Instead of running off into the bushes, she jumped into my open car door and sat expectantly in the passenger side. She’s been my main bitch ever since.