My BFF hates my boyfriend. I’ve been best friends with her for six years and dating him for two year. No matter what he does, she has something bad to say about it. They get into stupid arguments all the time. And she refuses to even hang out with him. It’s putting a strain on my relationship with both of them. What do I do?
You don’t say why your friend hates your boyfriend so I’m gonna assume he hasn’t mistreated you, assaulted her or done anything else that would indicate you need to break up with him. If that’s the case, you shouldn’t spend too much time worrying about whether what other people like and don’t like about your relationship. Not everybody can like everybody else and that’s ok. She doesn’t have be in a relationship with him. You do.
So if you want to keep both relationships but don’t want to deal with the drama, spend time with them separately to save yourself the headache. You indicate her as the shit starter, so I would also have a serious talk with her. I would say “Hey I know you hate BF and you can’t stand being around him, so I’m not going to invite you anyplace he’ll be unless I know you can keep the peace”. If she has to miss out on some outtings because she can’t be mature enough to be in the same room with someone she doesn’t like, oh well.
But, I’d like note here that one of the signs of a shitty relationship is that no one that loves you even likes him. It’s hard to see it when you in the middle of it, but friends and family can often have a different perspective because they can see it from the outside looking in. So if the hate doesn’t just stop with your BFF, but has spread to your whole family and all the rest of your friends, you might want to reevaluate that realtionship. As the saying goes, if it smells like shit everywhere you go, it might be you. And if everyone in your life hates your boyfriend, it might be him.
What do you guys think? Did I get it right? Have you ever been in a situation like this one? What advice would you give this reader?
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